Front page


Unexpected benefit in bagging system

2 Dec 12 | Re: Loose change breakthrough | Link-U-Post

Well excuse me, but I have a tip that is going to kick your ass. Seriously, once you read this you will have boot prints all over both of your buttocks. And my tip will be blowing butt-dust off its shoes. So read on!

If you have a lot of loose change, what you do is, go and use the automatic checkout at the supermarket. No matter how much your shopping comes to or how much change you have, chuck in all your change without counting it. Then put in the real money you were going to pay with. Then laugh with delight, long and loud, as the excess comes back to you in convenient and usable denominations.

To give an example: say your shopping costs £8.90. You have a ten pound note and a pocketful of coppers and silver, that comes to nowhere near enough for your shop. Do not put in the ten pound note straight away. Instead, chuck all the change in. Don’t bother counting it - the robo-machine does that for you. So, say the change comes to £3.44. You then put your ten pound note in, bringing the total you’ve paid to £13.44. The pay-o-tronic gives you back your £4.54 - but not as coppers and silver, oh no siree. You will normally get four pounds worth of one and two pound coins, a fifty p and two tuppences. Ha!

No more pockets full of change that you aren’t using.

No more counting out amounts of change at tills to use it up.

No more having to save up change in jars, count it and bank it (unless you want to).

Certainly no more using change-u-count machines that take a cut. Pah!

Nope, this is the future, right here, and this bright vista of loose change convenience is well worth having to get someone over occasionally to OK your beer can buying. It’ll make the country more efficient, too, as people will stop losing their coppers or throwing them away or leaving them in furniture, so the mint won’t have to keep making new ones. Thank you, faceless corporations.

Posted by COMMISSIONER GORDON at 17:24

[Back to main blog]

[Or dive into the blarchive...]

Take me home